It describes the physical, hormonal, emotional, psychological and social changes that happen when a woman becomes a mother, beginning in pregnancy, or whatever the path to motherhood (e.g. adoption).
It doesn't happen only once. It reemerges with every child. There is no fixed timeline or neat process. It is not a phase you simply 'complete'.
A Powerful Shift
Matrescence gives us the missing language for one of the most profound transitions of a woman’s life. It is as developmentally significant as adolescence, however most
women have never been told it exists. It isn’t routinely mentioned in any antenatal classes and you won’t find it in the typical baby books. It isn’t even defined in the
dictionary.
Matrescence names the normal upheaval.
The identity shift.
The mixture of joy, grief, love, overwhelm, expansion and loss.
The becoming.
Matrescence puts the mother at the centre of the story, not as a supporting character once the baby arrives, but as someone undergoing her own transformation.
What Does It Include?
Matrescence acknowledges that motherhood can impact:
Your body
Your mind
Your sense of self
Your spirituality
Your relationships
Your work
Your place in the world
It recognises that context matters. Who is supporting you? What pressures are you
under? The culture you’re mothering within matters.
Why Does This Matter?
The postpartum period is one of the most vulnerable times in a woman’s life. Many mothers quietly struggle, asking questions like ‘Why does this feel harder then I expected?’ and ‘Why don’t I feel like me?’. Many feel guilt, shame, or that they are somehow failing.
When we reduce shame, normalise the upheaval, create language for what feels overwhelming - we give mothers permission to feel what they feel.
Understanding matrescence allows a woman to meet herself with self-compassion instead of self-criticism.
“Pregnancy is the shortest ramp-up time for preparation for a job change that lasts a
lifetime.” @andreabombino_
Motherhood is not something we were meant to do alone. In an age of intensive
mothering, where women are told to do it all, perfectly, without dropping anything,
the pressure is immense. We were meant to have a village.
Becoming Mum – The Village
Modern motherhood can feel like a paradox.
Be ambitious. But don’t spend time away from your baby.
Be present. But make sure you spend time away from your baby.
Be grateful for every minute – it passes in a flash. You don’t need to love every
moment.
Be back in those pre pregnancy jeans. Don’t even think about your body image with a baby.
Be everything to everyone.
It is a lot.
Historically, mothers were surrounded by extended family and community. Today,
many women are navigating this transformation with far less collective support.
This is why community matters. Why understanding matters. Why being seen
matters.
You do not have to navigate this becoming alone. Becoming Mum is here to help.
